Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Return of Dutch

Due to a recent stint in rehab and occasional nights in a holding cell, Dutch is back on the keys shooting the shit that you guys wanna hear. Within the next week, I will finish up the St. Patty's Day shenanigans, my recent trip to Atlantic City, and the weekend up in Boston. Many people have been hounding me to get back on the blog and tell everyone about the insane shit that happens that some of you could only dream about. On a good note, over these last few weeks I have:

1. Given up drinking, only to fall back into an extreme boozing life style.
2. Fought a street sign while blacked out, and lost.
3. Spent all of my money in AC, but to find out the biggest loser was my friend who only came back with one shoe.
4. Woke up in Boston one morning, while the rest of my friends woke up at our hotel in Foxboro.
5. Had a entire cup of hot coffee dumped on me, and my response was laughter
6. Acquired a grenade whistle, but we call it a whore horn
7. Became addicted to Son's of Anarchy and River Monsters
8. And finally have given up on school work because Finkle purchased a roulette wheel and table

Since I have so much to talk about, leave a comment on which story you want to hear first. Spread the word, the blog is back and pumping out epic stories like it used to.

Dutch OUT

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Is Chuck Sheen the second coming of Christ, or just a legend of our time?

I'm sure most of you have seen the recent news about good old Chucky and are saying man this guy can't be for real. I think that anyone who thinks he has lost it is a complete jackass. The man is in complete control of his life. He is living the dream, already swimming in millions he goes out and convinces two porn stars, in which he referred to as his "goddesses", to become his girlfriends/fuckbuddies and help raise his kids. Now on tour, preaching the good word and sharing the stories of his life like young Jesus Christ did, imparting wisdom to his followers across the country. The man is invincible no matter how many times he goes in and out of rehab and how many DUI's he gets and drug tests he fails, the hookers, the drinking, his reputation never gets destroyed. He was famously named as one of the clients of Heidi Fleiss's brothel a few years back, his response was "I like sex and can afford it."He can also be known as "Wild Thing" in the movie Major League, where he rocked the most ridiculous pair of glasses along with an even more ridiculous haircut, and some how managed to seem badass and pork his teammate's wife. Chuck continues to amaze me. Im sure if you watch this interview you see how this man really lives the thugg life.              
    
     The man is ripping a dart on national television during an ABC interview and blowing the smoke into Andrea Canning's face. God like? I think so. When asked if he would submit to a drug test, his response was "sure got a cup?".  As he continues to light up another bogey and sip his long island iced tea I'm sure the only thing on his mind was what Andrea Canning looked like naked and if she would be willing to snort a line of cocaine off his pecker. Then when asked why he offended one of the creators of the show? He responds with, "Sorry if I offended you I didn't know you were such a puss... I mean you were so sensitive." Continue to follow his news and share the word of Chuck. AMEN.

-Wrecker out.